Introduction
An exercise designed to consider how much we really see of another person or hear from them and how much we are influenced by our own preconceptions and preoccupations.
Process
1. Do not alert people at the start to the nature of the exercise or they will not behave in a natural way.
2. Ask people to form pairs. Ask each person in turn to talk for TWO minutes, without interruption, about the same topic. You should chose the topic and tell them what it will be. It could be:
- your last holiday
- what your journey was like today
- your favorite film
- refugees
- drugs
- your childhood etc.
3. Ask each pair to sit away from other people. Time the exercise. Tell them when two minutes has passed and when to finish after four minutes.
4. At the end, ask them to turn back to back and give them the Observation Sheet. Allow time to complete the form. Do not allow people to turn around or to talk.
5. Ask people to stop writing and either stay back to back and tell each other how they have answered each question or turn and face each other and do the same. (No further writing is allowed). They can correct some things and discuss.
6. Back in the large group ask some questions:
- How many correct answers did most people get?
- Were some things generally easier for people to see than others?
- Do they think they noticed more or less than they usually do this time?
- If so, why might that have been?
- Was it easy to talk for two minutes without interruption?
- Was it easy to listen for that long without interrupting?
- What does the exercise say about the value of real listening and real seeing?
- What conclusions about personal inter-actions could be make?
Conclusion
This exercise is a good introduction to any work on conflict or communication or any other topic relating to people and inter-actions. In a simple way it makes some very strong points about what we see and hear and what we don’t and why that might be so.
Observation Exercise
What did I observe while listening to my partner?
Fill in the answers to the following questions, do not turn around and look at your partner, do this on your own.
- What color was your partners hair?
- What length was his/her hair?
- Did you notice anything about what your partner did with his/her hands? If yes, say what.
- What color were their eyes?
- What kind of shoes were they wearing?
- What color were their socks?
- How were they sitting? Did they change position? If so, describe the change as well as how they were sitting.
- Describe any jewelery your partner was wearing.
- Did you notice any facial mannerisms?
- Describe the tone of voice and anything you noticed about their use of voice.